More and more grandparents are raising their grandchildren. That comes with special challenges.
By Jennifer Bisram
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NEW YORK CITY, New York (WCBS) — The number of grandparents raising their grandchildren has risen over the past decade.
According to the American Society on Aging, over two million grandparents across the country are primary caregivers to their grandchildren. That comes with unique challenges, especially when it comes to housing and community support.
In New York state, there are over 120,000 grandparents who are the kinship caregivers. In New York City, about 250,000 children are being raised by relatives – mainly grandparents.
New York City has a special housing complex that helps “grandfamilies,” as they’re known, meet those challenges, so both the older adults and their grandchildren can survive, and thrive.
“I don’t know how long I can do this”
Seniors like Rosali Wynter have been taking on a second act of parenting after losing a child to death, addiction or incarceration.
Wynter, 77, is raising her 13-year-old granddaughter Aaliyah Myles. Wynter became Aaliyah’s caregiver when she was in her 60s, and Aaliyah was just 6 months old. Aaliyah’s mother was battling drug addiction when she was born, and Aaliyah was placed in foster care as an infant, until her grandmother, who she now calls “mommy,” stepped in.
“At first, when she was much younger, it was harder because I have to take her to the babysitter, go to work, pick her up,” Wynter said. “I didn’t realize it was so much. I was always saying I don’t know how long I can do this.”
“She’s always there for me, and she’s always there for important times,” Myles said.
“It’s hard to raise a child at that stage in your life”
Advocates say more living spaces, financial support and and resources are needed to take care of the growing grandfamily population.
Wynter and Myles have been living in a grandparent family apartment in the Bronx for more than two years. It’s a 50 unit building designed specifically for grandfamilies, with a social worker on site 24/7. Chalonda Reid is the building manager.
“At this point in your life, you are not supposed to be parents. You are supposed to be enjoying life, and it’s hard to raise a child at that stage in your life,” Reid said.
The West Side Federation for Seniors and Supportive Housing is the organization behind the program, which is financed through public and private funding. It was started in 2005, and the building that houses grandfamilies is still the only one of its kind in New York City.
“How do you look at a senior, or child, in need of something, and you don’t help. That’s hard to do,” Reid said.
So is there help for grandparents who are caregivers?
“You have to go out there, and it’s not as plentiful as it should be. It’s hard,” Reid said. “The social workers here will help them get children enrolled in school, medical benefits, medical doctors themselves, finding the services they might need.”
Some additional resources for grandfamilies in New York can be found here, and for families in New Jersey, they can be found here.
“I know I’m not alone”
The building is more than an address. It’s a home, with shared stories and helping hands.
“I know I’m not alone in this situation,” Myles said.
“The grandparent, as well as the child, still see the family unit together somewhat. They get that love,” Reid said.
“The difficulty is just to let her listen and understand what life is all about,” Wynter said.
Wynter said Myles is starting to take care of her.
“If I tell her to do something, she will do it,” Wynter said. “At night she will say, grandma why don’t you go lay down, why don’t you go sleep.”
Myles said her grandmother has been her guiding light.
So what has given Wynter the strength to care for Myles all these years?
“Just pray and have faith, If I’m not around, whatever I teach her can can carry her through,” Wynter said.
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